Tag Archives: grace

a simple ice cream

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a simple ice cream

It’s amazing how a simple act of kindness can bring such joy to your heart. I was the recipient of such grace today and it made this mama’s heart swell.

You know how some days you just feel defeated, tired, spent, overwhelmed, depleted, and joy-less? Well, on this particular day, that was my mood. I would have happily put myself back to bed to get up and try again, but no such luck!

I had prepared a breakfast supper for my family because that was the energy I had left for the day. And, let’s face it, we all enjoy breakfast for supper! Buttermilk pancakes, syrup, and cheesy ham and mushroom omelets were on the menu. Upon finishing, I realized the time, and quickly made my getaway to the store for the errand I’d forgotten earlier in the day before they closed. While I was out, the thought occurred to me how much I’d love an ice cream from one of my favorite places, ChickfilA. Now, did I need that ice cream? NO! But, try as I might, I couldn’t get the image of that cool, delicious treat out of my mind. Next thing I knew, my car kinda turned into the parking lot and I found myself in the drive-thru line. Before I knew it, I was ordering my delightful cup of yummy goodness!

The guy taking my order asked my name then what I’d like. I happily replied, “1 small ice cream please” he responded with “a kids ice cream then?” “yes”, I replied and he came back with “it’s on me tonight, enjoy!” Now, you would have thought I’d won the ice cream lottery or something! I was happily grinning ear to ear, pulling up to the window to pick up my long-anticipated treat. Once there, the girl handed me this cup full of their yummy ice cream. I quickly noticed this was not a kids size at all….it was like a size or two up!!! I pulled off and stuck my spoon into that cup of goodness and thought back over the details of my day, some pleasant and some not so pleasant. Suddenly, the delicious treat drowned out any negative events!

As I took the long way home to enjoy my ice cream, taking in the quietness of the ride, I suddenly had a revelation. Silly as it may seem, comparing a free ice cream to a spiritual lesson, I thought to myself: isn’t it just like God? We ask Him for something, and not only does He bless us, but He gives us more than we even asked for! WOW!

 

momma’s heart

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momma’s heart

We Moms love our children. Each one holds a special place in our heart. God gifts our children with His special gifts and a uniqueness all their own. My son is no different. I love him to pieces and treasure time spent together and occasionally, we get to enjoy a date when Daddy’s away.

We had one such date recently. Admittedly, I was a tad nervous about how it might go since he’d been disrespecting me by not listening when I call for him. I had discovered an outdoor event at a favorite park some distance away. While I knew he’d enjoy going, I was a bit reluctant that he might pull a Houdini and run away from me. My husband’s encouragement and prayers turned my fear into faith and dismissed any fears I might have.

We had a great time together that beautiful spring day! The sun was shining and we ventured to the park. He bounced in bounce houses til he was dizzy, scored lots of swag, learned quite a bit of history, and enjoyed the towering tree house in the park. My heart was full because he listened, obeyed and had “the best day ever”. Before we’d left the house that morning, I encouraged his behavior by dangling a carrot: “If you behave by listening to and obeying Mommy, we can have a slumber party tonight.” He was beyond thrilled at the thought of it!

We had such fun! He obeyed “right away, all the way, and with a happy heart,” meaning we would have that slumber party. We piled into Mommy’s bed and watched his favorite show, Arthur, til we both fell asleep. It was a memory I won’t soon forget. After all, the window for a little boy sleeping with his Mommy isn’t very long. He was so excited to snuggle up under the covers in the ‘big bed’ and watch tv. My heart was full! We were making memories!!

We had another such day! It was a full day of cross country, lego club, play at the gym, followed by a trip to a favorite restaurant with his friends for some lunch and yummy custard. I felt so grateful to have this time with him, to see him enjoy his friends and play til he was completely drenched with sweat. As we were leaving play time at the gym, his friend’s Mom invited him to ride in her van with the other kids. You’d think he was invited to go to Disney World! As I gazed into his beautiful blue eyes paying particular attention to his newly missing front teeth, he begged me to let him ride with his friends.  Hesitant at first as he’s not ridden with anyone but Mommy & Daddy, I agreed to let him go. He excitedly hopped in her van, his little face all aglow at this newfound freedom. Meanwhile, I hung my head as I climbed into my car all alone. It was a short 10 minute ride to the restaurant for heavens’ sake, but to me, it seemed much longer.

All at once, my emotions hit me like a slap in the face! I realized our special times together won’t last forever. Soon enough, I will fade into the background as he chooses his friends over me. He’ll be too big to have a slumber party, and more often than not, I’ll be riding alone while he rides with his friends. I encountered a little whiplash from the reality of what’s to come. As they say, the days are long but the years are short.

I decided to ask God to help me CHOOSE joy. Joy in the moments peppered with frustration and disobedience. Parenting is about living one chapter, one stage of life at a time. As parents, we get only one shot with our kids. I don’t want to miss out on the good days by allowing the hard days overshadow the good ones. So, seize the day shall me my motto, as I learn to live with purpose and joy, drinking in each moment asking for grace all the way.

 

 

 

 

 

Pondering

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At it again, guilty as charged! I’ve been doing some pondering lately….I found that something I’ve heard now and again over the years really irritates me. Kind of silly when you hear what it is, but the thought behind it is nerve wracking to me.

At some point in your life, I’m quite sure you’ve stated to someone that you ‘don’t have the time’ to do whatever it is you don’t have time for. Then, nearly as soon as those words have left your mouth, you’re met with the response: “well, we all have the same 24 hours in a day”. THAT’S IT! That’s an irritant to me, especially since it’s often said in a rather boastful and haughty tone, as if you are a lazy bum if you can’t work whatever it is into your schedule, or that you simply don’t care enough to do thus and such.

WHY does this statement make my skin crawl, you ask? More than anything, it’s the spirit behind it. Sure, there are 24 hours in a day; however, all 24 hours aren’t meant to be productive. Out of those 24 hours, 6-8 hours are assigned to sleep. Then there are hours dedicated to a job, chores, school, or what have you. And of course, there is time carved out for eating meals, reading, driving, yard work, etc. Imagine if you will, a pie to represent your 24 hours. Now divide that pie according to your day’s worth of activities and responsibilities. The time that is left is typically minimal. Within that “free time” or whatever you want to call it, is prime time, or time to spend as you deem necessary.

What people who make this statement aren’t considering for their victims is that we are all in different stages of life. Some have young children which take up oodles of their time since the kiddos can’t do much for themselves. Some are caring for elderly parents. Some work full-time jobs, and of those, considerable travel may be involved. Some are single parents who virtually have no down time. While some are empty-nesters allowing for a little more time. Additionally, some have family nearby that share some of the load.

So you see, when you get down to it, we all don’t have the same 24 hours. We do, but we don’t. Blanket statements thrown around such as this one, are just that: blanket statements. Let’s face it, we all have limitations. Some physical, or mental, or emotional. Some are highly motivated Type A personalities that require little sleep or relaxation. Others are more laid-back, perfectionists at times, who have different personalities and energy levels. We can’t compare people as if we’re robots. Not to forget, everyone has a different priority list. My priority for the day very possibly is not your priority, and likewise.

What I’m saying is we need to stop judging each other based upon our own standard of productivity. We need to offer a little more grace and compassion to those we encounter, who are most likely among friends.

Comparison is not a fair measuring tool, and will get us in trouble. Accept where you are productively and don’t project that onto someone else. In doing so, I think we’ll find more harmony in our circle of influence.

Stepping off my soap box now…..time-731110_640.jpg

 

 

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Ever feel like a “less than” Momma? Do you struggle with not having “me time” to re-fuel and replenish? Or, do you have days when you feel ill-equipped to raise your child?  Have you hit a wall with your sanity because you’ve been over and over the same issues with your kids yet reap no rewards for your hard labor? Like me, have you read every parenting book imaginable in hopes of discovering the secret of success?

I’m here to say you are normal. Now, if you are prone to live in any one of these places for too long, you may need to look outside of yourself and seek someone to talk to about the possibility of depression. Still, you’re not damaged, or un-fixable. Motherhood is not a job for the faint of heart. It’s important to know you are not alone on your journey and you are not the only one who’s ever had a certain problem with your child. If fellow Mommas would be real, authentic, and transparent with each other, I have a feeling we’d have fewer pity parties as we wouldn’t live in the comparison trap.

I recently watched a clip of a job interview taking place between the boss of a company and various prospective employees, all captured on video. Interestingly, the job description was laid out with the following “must have” qualifications. “To be considered for this job, you must be able to cook, have mad cleaning skills, be a teacher,  a financial planner, shopper, counselor, negotiator, disciplinarian, nurse, manager of people, a taxi driver, event coordinator; oh, and you must be available at a moment’s notice. You’re required to work week-ends and holidays, and you don’t get sick days. Working 24/7 is a must. Oh, and before I forget, the job doesn’t pay anything.”

Seeing the faces of these poor, unsuspecting people in need of a job was hilarious! I mean they were incredulous at each and every requirement necessary for the job. Pure disbelief and ultimate shock that such mandates were being made. At the end of the video, the boss explained that the job being described was for that of a Mom. Each hopeful employee stared ahead like a deer blinded by a headlight before the boss’ words actually sunk in. Once the light bulb went off, each one laughed then smiled in fond remembrance of the Mom that raised them. It was a tearful moment as they replayed in their mind all of the things that a Mom does….all without pay, and oftentimes without a simple “thanks”.

Often, the things we beat ourselves up most about as a Mom, aren’t on a child’s radar. Children are incredibly forgiving! We as Moms, are our own worst critic. Sure, there is always room for improvement and each day offers new grace. Upon asking a child what they love most about his/her Mom, you’ll hear qualities such as, “she’s pretty”, “she plays with me”, “I like it when she jumps on the trampoline with me”, “she is funny!”, and “she lets me help her in the kitchen”. Simple, yet forever imprinted on their little hearts.

So try to see yourself through the eyes of your child(ren). Time is an invaluable commodity. Stopping what you’re doing to pay them attention and engage with them through play is huge! I’ll never forget how much fun it was as a child to see my own Dad skip down the aisle of a grocery store. I asked him to and he obliged. I’m sure inside he felt like an ig-mo skipping down the aisle of a store. I can imagine that anyone who witnessed his silly skipping knew in their heart he was doing it for his daughter. I loved it and giggled at the sight of it! Umpteen years later, this simple skip stands out in my mind as a happy, beloved memory between me and my Dad.

 

 

Things I taught my children…

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Friends, today I’m bringing you a guest post from a very sweet, precious, wise woman friend of mine, Miss Terra Tucker. I believe you will find it to be worth the read!

Things I taught my children – that I would teach them all again:
1. Jesus loves you – He may not like your behavior at times, but He always loves you.
2. To treat EVERY single person with kindness – “the way you would want to be treated” – Golden rule.
3. To look every person in the eyes when talking and listening to them. Mr David and I used to make them order their own food at a restaurant from the time they were two years old to practice this one.
4. Never make fun of another person (especially for something they cannot help) or be intentionally hurtful toward someone – cruelty is never cute or acceptable for children of God.
5. When you mess up or are hurtful toward someone – apologize – (say the words – I’m sorry)- I mean sometimes it’s the very least we can do in life.
6. You are no better than anyone, but no one is better than you either.
7. Every person is worthy of being treated with dignity and respect because every person is made in the image of God.
8. For my girls, pretty is as pretty does.
9. God always knows. You can pull things over on your parents at times, and you can trick some of the people some of the time, but God sees the heart. He always knows and ultimately we all answer to Him.
10. Humility comes before honor, and to strive to have integrity.
11. To whom much is given, much is required…
12. God is always with you. You are never alone.
13. You can always come back home – both to God (no matter what) and to us – because His and our love for each of you is unconditional!
14. We believe in each of you to be all of who God has created you to be!
15. God gives grace because nobody’s perfect!

Parenting is work, but I promise that it’s worth it!!!❤️

Terra